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Sunday, July 25th, 2010
3:08 am - Sure, I'll post here too.
Not going to give you a long fucking backstory.  Joe and I divorced almost a year ago.  No big deal.  I live in Brewton and work an hour away in Andalusia.  That cute little baby is now a 7 year old grown ass man.  Fucking freaky if you ask me.  Shona doesn't talk to me anymore, neither does Matt.  not really sure what happened to either of them.  *Shrug* oh well.  What can I say?  Not in any relationship right now and don't plan to be.  It's 3 in the fucking morning, I think I'm getting sleepy but I don't want to pass out yet.  I hate sleeping my weekends away because they're so infrequent anymore.  Sure, they happen at the end of every week, but when your week feels like 7 bajillion years long, two days is infrequent!!!

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Friday, March 27th, 2009
2:53 pm - Back again!

I was sitting in front of my computer, on the phone with my home boi Phillip, when I noticed I had a new friend on Livejournal.  I thought for a second and realized I don't remember the last time I was on Livejournal.  Turns out, it was June 21 of '07.   Wanted to give a sort of update.
But first

HI NEW FRIEND!  NICE TO HAVE YOU!

So anyway.  I married a guy named Joe.  We've been married a little over a year now.  I'm not working.  Hanging out at home with the kid, cleaning, shopping for groceries, doing dishes, and enjoying being unemployed.  I met Joe back when I was working at Winn Dixie, shortly after Erik and I got back together.  We were JUST FRIENDS until Erik and I separated in January of '06.  We got married almost a year after my divorce was final.

I am now in my second year of school.  Almost half way to my degree.  I have actually entertained the possibility of med school.  I don't know what pre med would be like.  Maybe I should talk to my advisor.  Currently, I am going for Health Care Administration.  It's cool so far.  I've learned bunches and I'm having a good time.

Segue, walked out of Walmart today after spending less than $20.  Didn't think that was possible. 

Anyway, I don't know what else to say at this point.  I'm pretty boring.

TA!

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Saturday, July 21st, 2007
1:14 am - okokokokok

ok, so i haven't posted in a while.  fucking sue me.  update.  erik and i didn't work out after all.  we've been separated for well over a year and divorced for 2 months.  thank god it's over.  i have been dating a guy named joe for the past year and a half and it's kind of touch and go with him right now.  trying to get a hold of my best friend ever...shona, love me?  
i don't really know what to write except im a chiropractor's assistant now working in an office on my ass.  my job is actually pretty easy and i don't have anyone looking over my shoulder all the time.  the only downside is i can't get on the internet coz some sleezy dumbshit bitch downloaded the wrong update for our practice management software before i started and ruined the whole thing for everyone.  well, that;s democracy for you.



current mood: blah

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Tuesday, March 15th, 2005
11:32 pm - Die Mutha Fucka
Armed and Dangerous
Congratulations! You scored 87%!
You made it out, alive and well supplied. You probably even kept most of your party alive too. You know what to look for, what to take, and when to just run. You even feel a strange inkling to go back. If you did, you'd probably do just fine.



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Wednesday, January 5th, 2005
10:57 pm - And it Rains...
I show the smile that lights my way
I say the things that speak my soul
I do the things to prove that
I can do it on my own
And it rains...

I lift my ehad to kiss the sun
but all I see are shades of grey
I fight your clouds but lose and
once again I carry on
And it rains...

It washes all my hope away
and tears me up inside
it wrenches trees of dreams apart
and hangs them out to dry

If I could only find the path
back to my own front door
I might be willing to restart
and try it just once more

I stare into your shining face
in my heart I know the truth
and even though I stand here
next to you I walk alone
And it rains...

current mood: depressed

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Thursday, December 16th, 2004
4:58 pm - Something very very bad is about to happen...
...I don't know when it will happen or what is going to happen but it will be very bad and skinky and smelly for everyone affected by it...
I wish I knew more but I just have this feeling of impending doom and it's bothering me to the point of stomach pain...
no, I think I just need to use the bathroom...hang on...nope, still bad...I gotta go.

current mood: nervous

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4:24 pm - The things they type in Spam these days...
staying so long in one spot, and having well bird limed his to Jupiter, and besought him to give him horns. Jupiter, vexed him/her at many different levels. There needs to be an awareness
with the bird? Says Dillon, HBO thought it might cause damage to the caves. Most caves in the United States in general are usually safe unless there
unable to cope, sends Billy to stay with his Great Uncle David, wage war successfully with the hugest beasts, should perish
although they will have trouble buying and selling things, visiting Murray, and size full of acorns, and spreading his cloak under the branches,
convenient couch, and paged through a magazine. A while later richter Sleepy's Mage Guild on the North side of Town. Sleepy lives on the West Side.
assisted the aliens. His arrest is a strong signal that the pipeline of money dragged from my reverie of watching the passive screen to the
This is a fallacy for two reasons: one technical, and one social. her wings by the blow, she fell to the ground, and was caught by
you should save the game often. This may seem like a waste of time, but if you A MAN had two daughters, the one married to a gardener, and the
Travel in this dungeon is difficult; almost all of the doors are secret, and The effect that advances in technology has had on art in
Saving the game is done by staying at any of the Inns. If your entire active conferences and can send and receive electronic mail. While
natural instincts, bit its benefactor, inflicting on him a mortal use a system that constructs new realities, then the established
could hold the average worker in the business world obsolete. THE HARES waged war with the Eagles, and called upon the Foxes to
contemporary media, including the materials/sources shown in s possible to run out of space when we re dealing with something
to him through his terminal or workstation. Mr, Typalot is which is unfortunately high sought after and is in most cases
reconfigured the teleport back to normal. The guilt really set in that night.
emotionally. It has influenced the way in which we interact with
outside use by the CCC. This cleared up the question: The Bundespost was
technology has tried to sell to the public. Everything has been. I think you got angel wings Hiding up under there somewhere Down to my last peso, but I'm not afraid to say so. cutter yacht 0 double-pipe condenser 5 foitercrewless congelative
Mark Twain For example, in Year 1 that useless letter "c" would be dropped
to be replased either by "k" After fleeing, two teens were arrested on
Monday night and the others on Tuesday afternoon, said police Sgt

current mood: vexed

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Thursday, November 25th, 2004
12:30 am - all the things she said....
I felt this was appropriate since I got to witness the first professional inking of my sister, my friend, and my mother...
It was cool...
that's all I have to say about that.
on the way home, D.j. decided he wanted to be the first human puke machine...which was fun for me since Erik has a very sensitive stomache to vomit and amanda and haley were not really with it, haley having just gotten her new tattoo and amanda just coming down with a migrane.
FUN FOR ALL

current mood: frustrated

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Saturday, November 20th, 2004
11:15 pm - ...coz my name is heather, an untrusting whorewith values that shatter when you beg for more
So it begins, a life I've wanted for so long but never had an opportunity or backing or support from anyone to begin. a life i don't have to feel or fear will be overshadowed by one who once upon a time modelled her own life from mine. a life lived jointly by those i once abused, made amends with and merged with, accepting and admitting defeat but manefesting an all too powerful train that is to crack the music that we once new, throw it into a blender mixed with real life and a new outlook on life, hit the button and throw the mess in your face, leaving you to sift and focus on what all of it means to you. i truly cant wait until you here the blasting tones, feel the haunting lyrics, and see the blatant and raw truth dancing its way into your brain. we are truly a force to be reckoned with...
i would like to proudly and boldly like to introduce you to the RANDOM FAMILY!!!!
hope you like what you see because once you see it you will never forget

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Saturday, April 24th, 2004
1:17 pm

picture</a>

what Cannibal! The Musical character are YOU??


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1:13 pm

picture</a>

what kind of a goober are YOU??


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1:12 pm

picture</a>

which DUNE character are you??




current mood: contemplative

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Wednesday, April 21st, 2004
10:09 pm - fucking wit my flow!
don't know where my gods damned poetry book went. makes me sad in the sad spot. it's fucking wit my flow fuckers!
so how the hell is everyone? i'd like to welcome a new friend of mine, shaun. you're pretty awesome for a guy i've known about 3 weeks. thanks for welcoming me into your community as well.
i've got msi in my ears and i'm up still. i had a grand total of 2 hours of sleep last night and i'm still awake. went to bed at 5 and woke up at 7. i was up at like 8 yesterday morning, so i should be tired. i think i'm running on sleep dep.
erik got a job today! YAAAAAYYY FOR HIM!!! (happy dance)
i feel like ranting but i am having some trouble coming up with a topic. hmmmm...
have any of you seen that new show on mtv or whatever? the one about i want a famous face? is that not the most pathetic piece of shit show you have ever seen? i mean, i know there are some severely distorted people in the u.s., but to exploit their dillusions like that...we have some severe problems as a nation. i will admit i sat last night and watched 2 episodes of the show and i couldn't believe what i saw. i'm not talking about what these people did to their bodies, it's the fact that someone thought it would be a great idea for a show to follow these people who go thru plastic surgery to make themselves look like elvis or jlo that bothers me. how invasive is that?! i know the people being altered are alright with the cameras following them throughout their recoveries and documenting their lives afterwards. cool for you man, not for me. but what about the people who watch the show? why do they care that some 19 year old had breast implants and lip enhancements to look more like pam anderson? i think this nation has become so overwhelmed by what others are doing that they don't bother to look at themselves. i will admit that to a degree i am guilty of this, but you know what, when it comes to reality tv of this magitude, i think i'm going to start teaching my 10 month old how to read. fuck letting him watch that shit. you want to watch reality tv, flip over to cnn. that's reality. reality is not throwing yourself on an island where you "really" don't live and "really" don't know how to survive in that environment, just to vote off someone who called your mom a fat ass while the cameras weren't looking. i honestly don't think this nation could handle actual reality tv. follow around the struggling single mother who was raped, impregnated, and decided she didn't believe in abortion and is now working 2 jobs, going to school, and taking care of her 18 month old with little help from family and can barely pay the bills. that woman is real. she is a good example for her child and real. she knows what has to be done and does it. and she doesn't win money at the end of the season. she isn't looking for it. fuck you people who can't pull their faces away from these so-called reality tv shows. you're just as dilluted as the people on the show. you don't know reality. here, i have a solution. give me your house, your money, your car(s), and all but 3 of your outfits, find an abandoned building, or homeless shelter, then come talk to me about your fucking reality.
sorry if this didn't make any sense. i am having trouble focusing. i just guess when i brought up wanting to rant, my digits took over and i got to typing whatever came to mind.
you guys take it easy and get good sleep


"you wicked gay but then today i think i'll be hard core, if i forget to take my medicine then i'll be sick, "

current mood: blank

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Thursday, February 26th, 2004
8:25 pm - hmmm...again
Who were you in a past life? by Kat007
Name:
Birthdate:
Favorite Color:
Country:
You were most probably:Yourself, only taller
If not then you were:A nobody named Sal
Created with quill18's MemeGen 2.0!



Why am I not surprised!?

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Wednesday, February 25th, 2004
1:38 pm - Silence is golden
Today, as I awoke, I began my 3 day quest to find where I'll truly be happy. I am going to meditate about it, think about it, dream about it, but not talk about it for 3 days. To anyone. On Sunday, I will be ready to talk to people again...but as for the situation between Erik, Daymeon and myself, everyone starts off square. We'll see what happens from there.

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Tuesday, February 24th, 2004
2:59 pm - Hmmm.
Well, I'd almost forgotten about that lawsuit until I read Muzer's post last night about her getting her little slice of the pie. Mine came in today. I got $13.86. Kinda tingles in my special place. I also got my Flippy Combo today too, so that's two good things today to balance out the shitty stuff that's been going on the past few weeks. I made my decision to come back to Erik in haste. Now I'm faced with another decision. Stay with Erik or go back to Daymeon. It sux and I know this...but I have to make a decision. Erik had a good point last night. No one can move on with their lives until I decide which way I want to go...so I set up a deadline for myself. I should have my mind made up by tomorrow. When I told him this, though, he was like, "I wasn't trying to push for you to make a decision. I'm sorry if it sounded that way. I would respect you a lot more if you took your time and decided to be with him than if you hastily decided to be with me." That makes sense, but you know...now I'm confused.
Here's the situation:
Point #1. I don't want to have to break anyone's heart, but I know it's going to come down to it. It sucks, but I know it's what has to happen.
Point #2. I still love the both of them, a lot, but I can't have both of them. Which I know wouldn't happen anyway, so once again, I have to make up my mind.

Pros about Daymeon:
(these are going to be honest pros, so no going, "That's fucking wrong!")
1. I know he loves me.
2. He treats me really well and respects me.
3. He helps me with the baby even if it isn't his responsibility.
4. We have awesome fucking conversations. We seem to connect on a mental level.
5. The sex rocks. Sorry, but there's something to be said for a guy who is multi-orgasmic.
6. He is super fucking responsible. Right after we moved into my mom's he quit working at the Shell station because it was more expensive to keep gas in the car and he wasn't making the money for it. He scoured Opp looking for a job and bitched about it until he found one. He said he seriously felt bad for not having a job. It was like it made him physically ill.
7. He's really romantic...I won't go into details here, just believe it.
8. He's mature.
9. He knows what he wants out of life and puts forth the effort to get it.
10. He makes me smile.
11. He's so sarcastic. I just love it.
12. He's taking me to the Gathering of the Juggalos. (Big points j/k)
13. We have just enough things in common to spark the interest and enough things that aren't in common to keep it.
14. I could make new friends.
15. I get to get the fuck out of Alabama!!!

Cons about Daymeon
(these are also honest answers, see above comment on pros.)
1. He's not in Alabama and my family is.
2. He has a hot temper.
3. Being up there with him would put me far away from my family and friends.
4. There would never be a chance to go back to Erik if things went badly between me and Daymeon.
5. I would hurt a lot of people again if I left again.

Pros about Erik
(Again, honest answers only.)
1. He's putting forth effort to be better.
2. He is my husband.
3. He's closer physically to my friends and family than Daymeon is.
4. He helped introduce me to my best friend, Jordan.
5. We have a baby together, and DJ needs both of us.
6. We own our home.

Cons about Erik
(Don't make me say it again)
1. He is entirely too dependent on his parents.
2. He still does not know what he truly wants in life.
3. He is too clingy when he doesn't need to be and not clingy enough when it is needed.
4. He relies too heavily on me in regards to care for the baby.
5. Our mental connection is severely lacking to say the least.
6. My sexual attraction to him is lacking to say the very least.
7. He still is very single minded. He wants to talk about only what he knows about.
8. He still has a lot of growing up to do.
9. He lacks ambition to do what needs to be done to survive.
10. He and I fight a lot more than Daymeon and I do.
11. He can't/won't see most things from my perspective (but he's working on that.)
12. He's not entirely consistent about certain things.

If I think about anything else I'll write it. But currently, I'm all tapped out on ideas.

current mood: contemplative

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Sunday, February 8th, 2004
5:42 pm - Investigation...
I've made my decision. I want to go back to Erik. I just know it will work this time. It has to...
I'm going to start a little investigation on the shit Daymeon told me. Find out more about trust funds in general, stuff like that. I really feel like I've been lied to for the past 4 months. Not to mention, I really think he busted in my back door.
More later...

current mood: complacent

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Friday, February 6th, 2004
9:41 pm - Well, I'm here.
I'm at Erik's. I'll be here for a few days. Waiting to get the tax check cashed and trying to figure out how things would work with us together again. For my sake and my son's. I don't need any fucking Told-you-so's. I've heard enough of them. I know I've fucked up and my plan is to prove that I know it. To prove that I still love him and to prove that I can be trusted again. It's going to take me a long time but, you want to know the truth? I don't give a fuck how long it takes. I'll do what I have to. For as long as it takes. I want to be happy. I want to be with the one I love. I want my son to have the both of us...together...at the same time. I want me again! I want my life to have some semblance of normalcy if you can believe that from me. But it's true. I know that really doesn't hold water with anyone anymore. But I've learned a lot from this whole thing. The post I made on the 24th of January, I think, still stands. I know who my friends are. So I've got just as much a trust issue with people as they may have with me. And I like it that way. It's like starting all over again! But I'm being just as cautious this time. There are people I don't want to hear from though. And to those people: Bye! You had your chance...and you fucked it! Too bad, so sad, adious you fucking losers!
Time for bed!
Night!!!!

current mood: calm

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11:43 am - thuhtpz
That's a raspberry for all you kids at home.
So anyway...Don't really know what to write, it's been kind of an eventful week for me. I guess I'll just say that I've fallen in love again and got a job. And yeah. Still kinda giddy about the former, but the latter rocks cocks too!
Anyway, Erik and I are getting along...*tehe* really well. ;) It's cool! Makes me happy in my cockles...where ever my cockles may be! It just makes me happy there, Gods Damn it!
My back door got kicked in yesterday. I know who did it but I don't want to go into details. Let's just say, it wasn't me and it wasn't DJ. Yep.. That's about it for me this time folks! Join in next time as Professor Chaos meets the Happy Tree Friends!

current mood: chipper

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Tuesday, January 27th, 2004
7:47 pm - Hmmm
In an effort to explain things a little, I wrote this email to a friend of mine and I guess, after my last entry, People will be wondering WTF is going on with the psychotic person over there. So, here it is...so to speak.
Around December 2002: I fell in love. Not with my husband. With his best friend for whom we named the baby. I said nothing of this to anyone for hope that the emotion would pass. But it didn't
January 2003: Nothing
Feb: nothing
March: got marriedl
April: nothing
May: nothing
June: Had the baby! He's so fucking cute
July: nothing
August: Patsy(Erin) turned 16 and got her car. It died so Granddaddy bought her a newer one.
September: nothin
October: The love that I talked about in December wouldn't go away. I finally said something to the party involved, Daymeon. And he returned the favor. He loved me too. This was great, except for one fatal error...I was married. Shit...Erik asked me what was going on and I told him. The truth...all of it. The next day I left. It had been over between Erik and me for a long time and I had a baby to raise.
Turned 20.
November: Started getting things situated for the divorce. This is me...a nervous wreck. Daymeon turns 28.
December: Get the baby every other week. It works for being able to see him, but it keeps him in the weather and he ges so sick...so sick...
January 2004: I have come up with a proposal. I want to move to Pennsylvania with Daymeon. His family is up there and he needs to be with them. The proposal is this:
6 months with me
6 months with Erik
...until school time.
When that time comes, Erik chooses, school year with him, and summer with me...all summer, or, school year with me, summer with him...all summer.
No child support to be argued. Transportation paid solely by me...void where prohibited, offer good for a limited time, no substitutions, exchanges or refunds.
Patsy (Erin) and I went to health Department for physicals, found lump in Patsy's breast. She goes to the Doctor next Tuesday for further investigation.

That's about it. Ok, here's for the personal addresses.
Muzer: Hey, man. Haven't forgotten about you. Just had a lot of shit going on as of late. Tell me, what's up? Love ya!
Mattdoesntcare: At least you are still here...sort of. I love you man. And miss you like fuck! Deltachi!
Nenya: ...really don't know what to say to you.
I think that covers my friends.

current mood: complacent

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